I am ok

My good friends know I do not avoid discussing heavy issues such as matters of life and death.

When you have been so unfortunate to be chronically ill for so many years with a grim perspective of a long and debilitating illness, thoughts about life, death and happiness in between do occur in your mind every now and then and, thank God, less frequently in discussions. But if it does I will not run away from it and face it up front.

On the one hand there is almost unavoidable and sometimes overwhelming self pity, to realise this is sheer misery and suffering. But, and this will surprise you more most likely as it is totally inappropriate for my situation, the enormous strength and power I receive to endure and to overcome these feelings and replace it with happiness. Happiness? I hear you thinking? Well, in my opinion illness, suffering and death itself are not from God but damaging forces from the Devil. Yes, I do believe in God and I do know there is a Devil trying to pull me away from Him.

And that is exactly why there are always two sides to that discussion and they are exactly each others opposites. Illness, suffering and death versus joy, happiness, fulfillment and hope for everlasting life with nothing going wrong. Ever. I am alright even though there will come a time when my mind will no longer rule my body and eventually it will have to let my spirit go and die. But all that does not matter as my spirit will be renewed in a perfect body sometime. God is taking care of me now so I will sing His glory later. And I am ok now and I will be forever. Thank God.

“O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”

1 Corinthians 15 verse 55 NIV